dreams

I had the most amazing dream last night. I was pregnant and I could feel the baby inside of me and when I peed on a pregnancy test it said "yes. 11.3" in the window (it was a digital) and I knew the 11.3 was the amount of hcg in my system. I know it doesn't make sense on paper, but I was so happy! It was neat. They say in dreams that pregnancy represents possibility and a full feeling of potential. I am glad my dreams are so hopeful for the future and I'm not harboring any anxiety about the upcoming treatment. I really feel like once we get our push we'll have a good shot.

I'm really glad to have my dreams back. For a few weeks, maybe even a month or two, I was having these deep vortex sleeps that were just empty. But the last few days I'm actually having dreams I remember and are actually pretty vivid. A few nights ago it was a maze and a swimming pool. Then I had this one where I was in this huge warehouse and a man gave me a new wheel for my car...

Its exciting that my dreams are all about going somewhere and moving on and finding things. It gives me a lot of hope for the upcoming new cycle.


ETA: apparently I'm not the only infertile who obsessively analyzes her dreams during the tww. Check out this HILARIOUS blog: http://www.999reasonstolaugh.com/2010/01/815-your-dreams-never-tell-you-the-answers/

**there are two dreams i want to record for posterity: so skip this part if you find that kind of thing boring**
1- i dreamt i was walking along the country side and i came upon a farm. there was a very vicious looking dog barking in someone's backyard and when i got closer i could hear a small child screaming and crying. i knocked on the door and an old man answered and said that yard didn't belong to him but the dog and the kid are in the same family so i shouldn't worry about the kid. he walked out of the house and we walked up to the yard. the dog had stopped barking and the kid's mother was coming outside to comfort him. then i noticed that the dog looked emaciated and the man pointed out that this woman's farm was just "skinny" but everything was ok. he pointed to a buffalo that was so skinny i could see all its bones. as i was looking at it it pooped out a whole bale of hay. so weird. then the man and i walked up a hill and looked over the whole property from up there. then we went into the woman's house because she was having some kind of rummage sale and she started showing me sets of sheets. i admired them and thought they were so beautiful! then i woke up.

2-i dreamt i was in a parking lot of a rest stop with hubs and we were looking for a parking spot. ( a lot of this dream is hazy and weird. it comes in and out). then when i got out of the car i was pregnant and this weird neon yellow cm was coming out of me. i went to the bathroom and i peed on a digital hpt and was so excited to see that it said i was pregnant and that my hcg was 11.3. i was so happy and as i looked at the test my belly grew. then i walked out of the bathroom and the "rest stop" was this huge warehouse. very creepy and haunted house kind of maze style warehouse. it was a scarey place but also kind of exciting. there were a lot of men working and building things and one of them gave me a brand new tire for our car. the hub cap was all shiney and the tire was fully inflated and new looking. i hugged him really hard and kept thanking him, but even when i was hugging him i kept thinking about how gross and greasy he was. i took the tire and left.